Category Archives: oppositional defiance

“The Explosive Child”

A while back I wrote a post addressing an issue we’ve been having with our youngest son. It seemed like out of nowhere he began having daily meltdowns and violent tantrums and I began to question whether unschooling was the right thing for us. Well, this week I read a book called, “The Explosive Child” […]

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Stephanie - June 26, 2007 - 3:12 am

Thanks for this post, Evie.
I’m currently making my way between praising my children and letting them find their happiness in their own rites (and rights).
It is a difficult struggle for me, finding a balance between “no praise” and expressing a genuine happiness for them.
Maybe the difference is in the intention?
What I mean is, if it’s genuine, it’s all right, but if you’re trying to encourage a repeat the ‘good’ behavior it’s manupulative?
Not sure.
Anyway. (mayhaps I need to get out Unconditinal Parenting again.)
Thanks for the thoughts, and it was helpful to ponder this thing again from your own family’s situation and words.
A still thinking Steph.

whimsigal - June 26, 2007 - 4:07 am

If I could give my children one skill it would be the ability to find happiness within themselves and not search for it in externa, sources. TO this day I still seek my parents approval and I’m close to 40. You’re so right about there being a fine line between praise and manipulation and we, too, are still trying to find out where it is.

Thank you so much for your comment. You have been missed!